In my previous post, I reviewed a Bible study for couples facing fertility challenges. Today, I’ll review another publication from Stepping Stones: “Starting an Infertility Support Group.”

Written by John and Sylvia Van Regenmorter, co-directors of Stepping Stones, this 20-page booklet provides practical tips for those who want to start a support group.

The booklet addresses the following questions:

Section 1: Before you begin

• Are you willing to devote time and energy to this project?



• Who should begin a support group?



• Is it worth it?



• Do you have at least one other person who can help you?



• Are you willing to bathe this project in prayer?

Section 2: Deciding what kind of group you want
This section introduces you to several ways to structure your support group:

• Informal group of two or more people meeting for coffee and conversation



• Bible study or book discussion group



• Topical discussion group



• Counselor-led group



• Women-only group



• Couples group

Section 3: Getting started
This section offers tips for naming your group, financing your group, deciding where and when your group will meet, and publicizing your group.

Section 4: Odds and ends
This section suggests ways to structure group meetings, to share in prayer support, and to educate the church and Christian community about infertility issues. It also contains some helpful information about setting limits on how long to maintain the group.

I have facilitated a fertility challenges support group and I’m currently writing a booklet on how to start an adoption ministry in your church or community, so I was interested to see whether I could glean any new tips from this booklet.

Here are a few things I found particularly helpful:
You don’t need to have your infertility issues resolved before you start a support group, but you should be at the point where you’re ready to minister to others in addition to meeting your own needs.

The authors explain the pros and cons of meeting in a church vs. meeting in a private home vs. meeting in a neutral location such as a library or physician’s office.

They also offer some good information about maintaining a group. Infertility groups are tricky to maintain – those within the group often connect on a very deep level and when one couple achieves pregnancy, they usually leave the group because they don’t want to make the others uncomfortable. When that happens, the entire group grieves together, both for the member(s) who have moved on, as well as for the others in the group who are not pregnant.

The authors suggest deciding up front how long the group will continue. They recommend starting a new 10-week group periodically, so that those who would like to leave the group can make a graceful exit, so that those who want to continue can form a new group, and so that potential new members don’t’ feel awkward about joining.

This booklet can be purchased from the Stepping Stones bookstore for $11.00.



You can also register to receive the ministry’s free 8-page bimonthly newsletter, Stepping Stones. I just received the May/June issue, which discusses the role that humor can play in healing a heart hurt by infertility. The July/August issue will focus on pregnancy loss.