Part 1 of 3: Book Review

Books for menopausal women assume that their children are grown and that they have time to themselves. Books for first-time moms assume that the moms are young and energetic. Hot Flashes, Warm Bottles bridges the gap. It’s for midlife mamas—first-time moms over 40.

Midlife moms are those who watch Sesame Street with bifocals. They’re the ones who are reading Dr. Seuss to their child when the mail carrier brings an introductory offer to join AARP. They’re the ones who are often sandwiched between caring for their aging parent and caring for their young child.

Hormonally-challenged menopausal mommies are prone to wild mood swings. These physically depleted midlife moms feel young and want to be energetic, but have babies or toddlers who sap their resources. As a result, they feel guilty about their inability to live up to the myth of The Perfect Mother.

Nancy London, a licensed therapist specializing in women’s issues, understands what it’s like to be a midlife mama. After five miscarriages, she gave birth to her first child when she was nearly 44.

London leads support groups for first-time mothers over 40, and her book is packed with engaging anecdotes that the women from her support groups share. London devotes entire chapters to infertility, adoption, balancing work and motherhood, and the sandwich generation (caring for elderly parents while simultaneously raising young children).

The end of each chapter features “The Journey Book,” a series of questions and discussion starters that readers can use to create a journal-scrapbook. An Appendix at the end of the book outlines an eight-week support group curriculum that first-time moms over forty.

London’s anecdotes include all types of moms: married mothers, single moms, lesbian moms, and women who live with same-sex partners. There is no particular religious bent to the book; its tone is “politically correct,” but in a matter-of-fact way; the women London interviewed just happen to represent all walks of “mommy” life.

Laced with comfort and practical tips, Hot Flashes, Warm Bottles is a highly-readable, comforting book that any mom (or mom-to-be) over 40 will find helpful and encouraging.