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The time between the moment you decide to adopt and finally holding the child(ren) of your dreams spans eons. How can you survive the wait?
Pray: Pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17). Pray for everyone involved with your adoption.
Memorialize the wait time: Blog, journal, scrapbook, but somehow create a way to document your journey.
Read: Currently on my bedside shelf you will find: Raising Adopted Children, Post-Adoption Blues, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew, The Primal Wound, Being Adopted, and Adopting the Hurt Child. Kids books I have are: The Mulberry Bird, A New Home For Zachary, The Colors of Us, and How Micah Helped Build a Family.
Research: Get familiar with adoption language; the homestudy process; and any special conditions your child may have. You can also research travel options, compare prices and sign up for reward mileage programs, etc.
Get support: Online forums abound! Additionally, venues like Yahoo, Google and Topica have e-mail discussion lists. You can join by your age, state, ethnicity or the child’s age, country of origin, special needs or any other number of criterion. Places like Café Mom, iVillage and other online communities also have boards and e-groups for adoptive parents in a variety of categories.
Bond: Write, call or e-mail your child. Send newsy letters with pictures to acquaint them with how life will be with you.
Shop: When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping! Shop for their rooms; shop for clothing (though do be aware there are often delays with adoption time frames, and children grow quickly!); shop for books; and shop for pampering things for yourself.
Volunteer: Do something for others to take your mind off of your situation. There are many worthy charities, and you can even find one that is adoption-related (perhaps with a foster care focus, domestic violence, court appointed special advocates, or something that ties in with your particular adoptive situation).
Spend time with your nuclear family: My husband and I know that our time with our only child is coming to an end soon. We are making a concerted effort to really spend quality time with him before his siblings arrive.
Create your announcements: Being the crafty chica that I am, I have created some announcements on my computer. When the adoption becomes final, I’ll insert our official picture in it. Meanwhile, I’ve also spent time updating my address book so I can have those labels ready to go when the time arrives!
Hopefully, these ideas will get you though the tough waiting time. It seems like an eternity, but the light does finally shine at the end of the tunnel and will soon find you gasping for breath at the whirlwind you will soon be embraced by!
