Kids ask lots of interesting questions about their friends, relatives and classmates who were adopted. Adults ask many of the same questions. So Amy Coughlin and Caryn Abramowitz put their heads together and wrote a book that responds to those questions in a simple, direct fashion.

Cross-Cultural Adoption: How to Answer Questions from Family, Friends, and Community is organized in three parts.

Part 1 lists the questions kids ask and offers a brief response to each. The authors then provide additional information for the older child or adult who may have asked the same question. Some of the questions include:

*Will she be able to understand me and speak English?
*What if she wants to go back to her birth parents?
*Won’t she feel sad when she finds out she’s adopted?

Part 2 is a detailed list of do’s and don’ts for grownups. For example:
Support her when curious strangers ask questions.

A stranger sees your daughter, whom you adopted from China, and bursts out, “That’s so sad that she was abandoned like that! She’s so cute! I can’t imagine her mother would just leave her on the side of a road!”

The authors recommend that you respond in a way that shifts the conversation to positive adoption language and lets the child know you are on her side. You could respond,

“’Abandoned’ is not really a good way to put it. A lot of care and love goes into the adoption process in China. Her birth mother made sure she was safe. She was well cared for there, and she is healthy and happy now.”

The authors also suggest that you ask the person to put himself in the birth mother’s shoes:

“We all can understand the feeling of being alone, without any help, not knowing where to turn. What would any of us do if we really faced those circumstances, especially right after giving birth?”

Part 3 provides an overview of each of the top 10 countries from which Americans adopted abroad in 2003: China, Russia, Guatemala, Korea, Kazakhstan, Ukraine, India, Vietnam, Colombia, and Haiti.

Each overview is organized according to the country’s geography and population; history and government; economy; culture and holidays; food; interesting fact; literature and other books for further reading.