Since arriving home, post-finalization, we’ve reconnected the kids with their birth grandparents and older brother via weekly phone calls. They are a really warm and wonderful family, and it’s been truly gratifying to hear from them how much they feel we really are “one big family”

That said, I’m struggling to find ways of describing people in this new family configuration. In my total newbie ignorance, I’ve apparently already blundered by uttering the “our birthmother” phrase. I “get” that a significant majority in the firstparent community takes umbrage with it, so for that reason alone... more

Today was just one of those days. You just knew upon waking that things were going South on an unstoppable runaway train, and soon there would be a wreck!

My oldest has been sick for the last couple of days with a head cold. Now, as I remember from my days working in a child care center, behavior is often the first clue that illness is brewing. I’m tempted to think that my youngest may have gotten the bug, because he has just been Mr. Cranky all day!

Our futile attempts to get him to nap were met with hostile resistance, and despite his body’s needs, he kept getting out of bed and playing with his toys. So, when it was time to call his birth grandmother, he was just over... more

I certainly did think exactly that. To be honest, I thought it more than once in the 14 years that Super Dad and I have been adopting and fostering children. Six of our seven adoptions were through the state foster care system and are considered special needs by the state.

Why the sudden true confessions? Yesterday, I received an email from a college student working on a project she called “six degrees of separation” for her Research Methods and Gathering Class.” She had found my email address on my special needs blogs and wondered if she could ask me some... more

Depending upon the agency you choose for your adoption, you may be required to undergo post-placement visits. Our agency requires two visits, and we had our first one today.

Post-placement visits are intended to assess how well both the adopted children and the adoptive parents are adjusting to their new family life. Because the goal is framed as a positive one – to keep families together and avoid disruptions – your social worker is a valuable resource.

Our social worker found that things were progressing amazingly well for only four weeks at home. She was pleased that we had already put so many things into place already and accessed many needed services: the children have... more

I’ve been devouring books by Deborah D. Gray. I bought her Attaching in Adoption awhile back, based on the phenomenal reviews I got online and from people I knew. Because I had so many other books that were recommended to me, in addition to all the pre-adoption preparation I was going though at the time, I set the book aside.

This week, I came across Ms. Gray’s latest book, Nurturing Adoptions, and I snapped it up. Hubby and I feel at such a loss as to how to handle the profound issues our daughter has, and this book seemed to have answers. It does... more

Today was truly a Love Thursday at Casa Stro! From the moment they got up, my sons were glued at the hip. They played (nicely!) together; they had a mock rock concert with dueling guitars, and my youngest watched my oldest in awe during Lego Robotics FLL Team Practice today. Interspersed throughout the day were liberal, “Hey, Buddy!” “You’re my Buddy!” and “I love you, Buddy!” comments from one to the other. While the “buddies” declared their love for each other, they would lay their heads on the other’s shoulders... more

You have adopted an older child into your Christian family from the foster care system or an orphanage abroad. The child has never been to church, which has been our experience with most of our foster children. You would like your new child to learn the stories and verses that you may have grown up hearing, a foundation for faith. You would also like your child to get excited about doing it. You want your child to meet other Christian children and make new friends with similar thinking families.

Your new children may be lonely. They are probably missing their friends... more

I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. (John 10:10b)

Where on earth have I been, you may have asked? Well, Friday marked one month since the adoption was finalized. I’d love to say that we’re thriving, but in all honesty, we’re in survival mode. I know adjustment - grand adjustment of this magnitude – takes time. The kids are dealing with separation from their foster family, a move approximately 2,000 miles away, a new home, new friends a new church family, a new pet – so much! The rest of us are adjusting to having our family... more

Have you thought about your daughter’s purity? Don’t wait until it is time to begin dating to discuss the subject, as uncomfortable as it may be. Don’t just assume your daughter will know what to do in a pressure situation, if you haven’t helped her to plan her actions. This can be especially important if your daughter was exposed to questionable activities prior to her adoption.

My sisters-in-the-Lord threw a book shower for Amigrace when we brought her home. One of the books we received was The Princess and the Kiss, by Jennie Bishop. My friend said that she and her... more

How carefully did you look at the name you chose for your newborn when you decided to adopt? Did you dissect the name to see what possible combinations people could come up with from it? Apparently, we didn’t look close enough. Now what should we do? Is an emergency name change or spelling change in order?

We spent months coming up with our daughter’s name. We wanted a name that had real meaning behind it. We chose a special name for our daughter that reflected our joy to an answer to years of prayer. The name we chose also reflected our family heritage. How... more