I was just reading an interesting post in the blog, "The Life of a Texas Mom." Gwen, a Christian adoptive mom of three, details a conversation she had with a couple of the moms at her daughter's softball practice. One of them asked where her daughter got her blonde hair. Rather than go into detail about why one daughter had blonde hair and the others didn't, Gwen explained that her children were adopted.

The woman Gwen was talking to was offended that Gwen hadn't explained instantly that her children were adopted, and Gwen... more

In the previous post, I defined post-adoption depression and provided some tips for how to decrease the likelihood of experiencing it.

Today, I’d like to introduce you to one of the best books for adoptive parents that I’ve read in ages: The Post-Adoption Blues: Overcoming the Unforseen Challenges of Adoption, by Karen Foli and Dr. John Thompson.

This... more

We’ve all heard of postpartum depression, which Dr. Mark Lerner says “may be caused by significant physiological and hormonal changes.”

Post-adoption depression, on the other hand, “focuses on the feelings of sadness that are experienced after the attainment of a long-term goal that has required time, money, effort, emotional strain and patience.” The symptoms can range from generally feeling sad to extreme despair.

According to an informal survey of... more

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Haitian special needs adoption is the topic of the day in the nation’s newspapers. In an article for Knight Ridder Newspapers, April Saul detailed the story of a Pennsylvania family who traveled to Haiti to adopt a 4-year-old boy who had been burned and abandoned, and a 3-year-old boy who is HIV-positive.

The U.S. is one of the few countries that allows families to adopt a foreign child with HIV, writes Saul. According to the boy’s mother, Heather Maeding, a Haitian official who didn’t believe that she and her husband would want to adopt... more

“Your son looks so much like you and your husband – he looks as if he could be part of your family.”

“He is part of our family,” I reply.

“You know what I mean,” says my new acquaintance.

I am silent. I know what’s coming.

“He resembles you so closely. You’d never know that he’s not your real child.”

Adoptive families are regularly assailed by acquaintances who make thoughtless remarks in the presence of our children. We can choose to ignore the remarks, make an angry retort, answer graciously or respond with a little sly humor.

One... more

We adopted our sons when they were newborns, and adoption has always been a normal part of the vocabulary around our home. When Ben was 6 years old and Josh was 3, we went to the hospital to meet one of their newborn cousins. The boys looked around in wonderment. Babies were born in hospitals!

“I thought all babies came from the adoption agency,” remarked Ben.

We have never led our sons to believe that all babies originate at the adoption agency; that was just their assumption. To them, adoption is the normal way to join one’s family; they think it odd that babies appear on the scene in any other way.

When Should You Tell Your Child Who His Birth Parents Are?

Recently,... more

I’ve just returned from a week at my favorite writers’ conference, Mt. Hermon’s Christian Writers Conference in California (near Santa Cruz and San Jose).

Mt. Hermon is considered the premier Christian writers’ conference on the West Coast, and the 400 registrants came from all over the U.S. and Canada. From novices eager to learn the craft of writing to well-known authors who’ve published hundreds of books, this conference offered something special for everyone.

What a difference a year makes My experience at Mt. Hermon this year was quite different from last year’s. A year ago, I attended with the goal... more

On Monday, March 20 and Tuesday, March 21, Focus on the Family’s radio program will feature adoptive parents Billy Jack and Anne Barrett. The Barretts have six children, four of whom were adopted from abusive backgrounds. Their Colorado farm was featured on ABC’s Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.

You can read more about the Barrett family at the Extreme Makeover: Home Edition Web site.

You can also read an article about the Barrett family’s visit to Focus on the Family

To learn how to listen to next week’s broadcast, visit Focus... more

Continued from previous post

Some people “poo poo” the idea that God has a hand in bringing together adoptive families and birth families. But I’ve seen His divine hand working in so many ways in my own life during the past 13 years that I refuse to attribute it to fate or coincidence.

While my husband and I were praying for the child we hoped would someday be ours, his birth parents were also praying for him – for the family that would someday be his. The very evening we met, our prayers converged and were answered.

Our son’s birth mom has told... more

In domestic newborn adoptions, some degree of continuing contact among the birth and adoptive families is now the norm. In addition, prospective adoptive parents will likely be encouraged to meet the woman (and possibly, the man) who are pregnant with the child they hope to adopt – before the child’s birth.

As I discussed in my mega, 18-part series that detailed our own adoption story (see Part 6: “The Big Meeting”), every pregnant couple who was interested in selecting us to... more