Jody Moreen, one of adoption.com’s forum hosts, is “resurrecting” the Christian Adoptee Fellowship forum, which has been inactive for about a year.

You can find the group at www.christianadoptions.com. On the Home page, click “Protestant” in the list of denominations from the “faiths” index on the left side of your screen. Then click on “Christian Adoptee Fellowship.” (There are also forums for Christian Adoptive Parents and Bethany Christian Services, in case you’re interested in those).

Jody is editor of Adoption Blessings Newsletter and she also hosts a Yahoo! group called Adoptees Christian fellowship,... more

During the years I’ve spent researching and teaching about adoption, I’ve been asked similar questions numerous times. In an upcoming series, I’d like to tackle these questions with you. I don’t think there are right or wrong answers, but we can certainly share our experiences, our reflections and our knowledge with one another. Since this is the Christian adoption blog, let’s try to share from a Christian world view.

How to Respond Please send your responses to any and all questions to christianadoptionblog@adoptionmail.com.

In the Subject line, put FAQ # (insert the number of the question... more

One of my readers named Lois adopted six children internationally in the 1970s. Her children, who were school age when she adopted them, are now in their 30s.

One of her children was from the U.S. Two were from Korea and were adopted at ages 10 and 7 (they are not biological siblings) One was from Brazil and was adopted at age 7 Two were from India and were adopted at ages 10 and 8 (they are biological siblings)

Lack of bonding Lois writes, “I only wish it was the tight-knit story-book family one dreams of when going into adoption. Each has his/her own issues (probably would anyway had they been homemade),... more

Waiting…and Waiting Some More Continued from previous post

During the next few weeks, we met the pregnant couple several more times, all in very informal situations. At our second meeting, the baby’s parents both wore enormous black leather jackets and the father smelled strongly of cigarette smoke. My husband and I, both high school teachers, didn’t even notice their attempt to shock us.

One time we met at McDonald’s and our son’s birth mom and her husband met us there. During the past year and a half, she’d become our biggest cheerleader, always encouraging us in our parenting and in our attempts to adopt a second child. She and the baby’s... more

The Final Loss Continued from previous post

After two weeks of no contact with the baby’s mother, my husband and I held on to only the slenderest hope that this adoption would become a reality. Our counselors at our adoption agency were at a loss as to what to do.

Finally, the mother’s counselor used a bit of deception, calling the hospital, saying that she was a friend and that she urgently needed to speak with the baby’s mother. The nurse replied that the baby’s mother wasn’t at the hospital. The counselor then inquired as to the baby’s health, and was informed that he had gone home with his parents the previous week.

Our prayers... more

Situation #5 Continued from previous post

With the baby’s due date in eight weeks, my husband and I began to shop for infant clothes and think about names. The baby’s mother checked in with us to let us know she was taking a short trip to California to visit her husband, who was in the military and had just been stationed there.

A few days after her arrival in California, she gave birth, eight weeks prematurely. The baby’s mother phoned her adoption counselor in Washington to tell her that the baby was in precarious health.

We heard absolutely nothing for 10 days. Finally, the baby’s mother contacted her counselor and said that she... more

Situation #5 Continued from previous post

Our move to Seattle complete, we were anxious to learn more about our latest potential adoption. Our first meeting with the 19-year-old woman was fabulous – the best ever. The woman was a new Christian who said she believed God had allowed her to get pregnant so she could give her baby to people who otherwise couldn’t have one.

Was this woman for real? She seemed like a gift from God…almost too good to be true. She was due in four months. She said she was determined to relinquish and assured us that God was telling her that we were the right family for her baby.

In a bit of a strange... more

Situation #4 Continued from the previous post

A month and a half later, we were invited to meet a couple whose baby was due in two weeks. This situation was a bit out of the ordinary (but really, is there anything ordinary about adoption?). The unborn baby’s father wanted to parent the baby, and the baby’s mother wanted to place it with some friends of her family.

The mother and father had broken up and the tension between them was high. She refused to allow the baby’s father to have custody of the child. He was willing to agree to adoption, but only in the event that a couple unknown to them and their families would adopt the baby. That couple... more

Receiving Support Through Adoption Loss Continued from previous post

Finally, we were informed that the birth mother had chosen another family. We felt as if we had been rejected. Again. The last thing we wanted to do at that point was to call everyone and tell them we’d been rejected.

When the calls did begun trickling in, people’s response to our news was “Oh.”

Oh? What kind of a response is that? I thought.

I’ve learned to become more gracious since then, because I now know that our friends and family simply didn’t understand the kind of emotional support we needed. Because they hadn’t experienced the complexities... more

Grieving Adoption Loss Continued from previous post

During the time I was struggling with my emotions concerning the loss we had experienced, I attended a women’s retreat with my sister-in-law. There I connected with a woman I hadn’t seen since college.

She sensed my sadness, gave me a long hug and literally demanded that I grieve. I’ll always remember her stern, yet loving advice: “You have lost a child. You were planning for this baby just as you would have if you’d been pregnant. That child is gone now, and you need to let yourself mourn for him.”

She granted me permission to grieve – something I hadn’t allowed myself to do until... more